---Author's Notes 2/3/03--- I decided to revise this story completely as I wrote myself into a corner the last time. There are only a few minor changes in grammar and a few new sentences added or changed. The thoughts have also been rewritten without the '[ ]' marks. Well, please enjoy this new version of Evangelical History. ---Title--- Evangelical History - Chapter 1 A Ranma 1/2 - Evangelion Fusion By Dr. Suekeiichi Kaiton ---Antarctica, 2000 AD--- White. A field of blinding purity. Snow blanketed everything in sight. Gently sloping dunes melted into the scenery of Earth's last undiscovered country...Antarctica. The bleak white wasteland provided no comfort from its harsh elements but merely embraced one with cold, slow, numbing death. The plateau stretched on into infinity, white melding with white, unbroken in the harsh silence except for one gray blemish on the surface of that alien terrain. The wind began to rise, an inhuman howl that brushed against the alien structure, rattling the durasteel walls and eliciting shivers from the technicians walking along the perimeter. Grayish-white, with antiseptically clean corridors and labs, this was the proving ground for the Katsuragi Expedition. Composed of nine-inch thick durasteel plates with a foot of the highest-grade insulation and heated from within by a centralized hydrogen generator, the base was three miles in diameter with four levels. The top level was ground which composed the outer walls and holding areas for VTOL and snowmobiles, the rest where deep below the surface crust of ice. It was built within a year for the personal use of the Katsuragi expedition, its facilities included biomedical labs, testing facilities and a docking bay. The bay itself was a mile underground, a sleek steel tomb for a God, a God who had slumbered there for countless eternities before being freed from its frozen prison for the use of selfish individuals. The wind howled and tore at the scientist's uniforms, those poor fools standing in open doorways for a smoke. The harsh conditions afforded no protection from sudden and violent frostbite nor the inevitable gangrene that followed so those individuals that just needed a cigarette were forced to stand by open doorways or windows as no smoking was allowed in the lab itself. Doctor Katsuragi himself was biting back a chill as he blew a cloud of oxygen and smoke into the blustering wind, watching the mass freeze into tiny particles and drift off into the white abyss. A wan man with a sickly look about him, Hiromi Katsuragi was watching the landing pad with interest as his only true confidant in the expedition left. A VTOL was readying for takeoff at that moment, its cargo one man. The man was dressed in a nutmeg parka with a thermo-suit underneath, standard issue clothes for the Antarctic. His glasses were frozen over with a thick layer of frost as he boarded the craft. Gendo Ikari shut the thick door tight after him and nodded across the pad to Katsuragi. The curt doctor waved his cigarette at the departing man. Within a moment the ship was gone from the scene, its passenger safe from the catastrophe yet to come. Deep in the subterranean depths of the complex, a fourteen year old girl with purple hair wandered into the lab area. She was dressed in the thick parka and muffler that the rest of the technicians wore but had the front unzipped enough so her face could be seen, beautiful dark eyes glittering over the puffy plastic of the thermo-suit. Misato Katsuragi was a curious girl, eager to come and see her estranged father after so long but still apprehensive on exactly what she was doing here. Without a thought, she entered the enormous docking bay with its mysterious giant awaiting release. The creature was still buried in a thick layer of ice which impeded a real view of the subject's skin or features, the only thing discernable was the spear. It was found in a deep ice cavern far below the complex itself, at the very apex of the planet. It was humanoid with four limbs, a thick trunk and a red rust-colored spear jutting from its chest. The red spike seemed interwoven with the material of its chest, as if the spear was an extension of the being itself. The weapon was nick-named "The Lance of Longinus" after the Roman centurion who impaled Jesus on the cross, while the giant remained under the codename "ADAM," as in the progenitor of the human race. It was a black and lifeless thing that stood on its hunches with the spear resting on the deck in front of it as a sea of tubes, wires, and scaffolding poured from its body. Misato dared herself to grasp the thin steel railing on the topmost level and look down at the darkness below. Occasional sparks from shorting equipment were all that greeted her eyes. Dr. Katsuragi was testing his Solenoid theory on the giant and the project's investors were quite impressed at the success of the project. His funding was promised indefinitely by GEHIRN if the quality of work persisted. So intense was the work that his family life suffered as a result, his wife growing cold and his daughter growing petulant. The teen gave one last look down into the gaping hole of the Earth before turning back in disgust. One month out of the year, her ass! Why had her "father" taken her all the way to Antarctica? She had been cast away from his lab and was wandering aimlessly around the base, her footfalls tapping on the metallic floor paneling. She walked drearily on along the catwalk until bumping into a technician and spilling his tools over the deck. So bumped back was she by the impact that her boots skidded across the railing and she felt the thin railing bar bite into her shoulder-blades as her feet continued to slip. She screamed as she felt nothing under her legs and the call of gravity began to pull her down the bottomless pit. Darkness was at the back of her eyelids and she prayed for the bright light of heaven. Instead of heaven she found an angel. The technician dove for her and caught her arm in one hand, his other latching onto the slippery rail. She felt a wave of vertigo shudder through her head and opened her eyes, expecting to see the ceiling lights far away but instead awakening to an upside-down world. The tech used his sliding momentum to spin them both over the railing and back to the walk, his movement and rescue defying several laws of motion in the process. He hit the metal on his back, clutching her to his chest and taking most of the impact. She felt his breath against the back of her hair and screamed again, not really understanding that she was safe. When the world stopped spinning, she sat up from his chest and rolled off onto the slippery catwalk. "Are ya alright?" He was trying to regain his breath. "That's quite a fall. What were you doin' in here anyway?" The raven-haired eighteen-year old sprang up and landed on spiked boots, the metal spikes digging easily into the thick layer of frost. "You shouldn't be walkin' around in here without cleats." "I...I was just walking around, I guess." Misato had the good conscience to look ashamed at her risky behavior. "Well, little girls like you shouldn't just be 'walking around' especially in here. You could've died, if I hadn't caught ya." She felt his arms encircle her waist as he coiled his legs on the floor and shot up to the third story catwalk in a single leap. "Here ya go miss...?" "Katsuragi, Misato Katsuragi." The third-story landing was an enclosed space where her father regularly went over the latest readings. Since she could tell he didn't want to speak with her, she had secretly been following him around, trying desperately to understand his distance and coldness towards her. There was a chair off to the side of the console so she sat down heavily, still trying to fathom how the older boy was able to defy the laws of gravity so casually. "My father is the leader of the expedition." "Oh!" He replied with a knowing grin. "That's why you're here, I was wonderin' what a little girl like you was doing in the Arctic." He was grinning like a buffoon. "'Little girl?' I'll have you know I'm fourteen and a half! I can take care of myself!" She flashed an indignant scowl at the young man who was showing such impetuous indifference to her obvious superior intellect. "I'm already in high school, I'm one of the smartest kids in my class, how dare you call me a 'little girl!'" "Hey, you've got spunk huh? Well nice to meet ya Miss Katsuragi, I'm Ranma Saotome." She obviously wasn't impressed as she crossed her arms and lifted her nose in the air. "Don't worry 'bout it, my father used to drag me all over the place when I was your age too." She lowered her eyes again to look closer at the youth. He looked about eighteen or twenty with raven-black hair and an angular face still retaining vestiges of youthful fat. His eyes seemed almost iridescent in the blue gloom of the chamber which unnerved her slightly. "And what is your job here, Saotome-san?" "Just Ranma's fine." He waved her question off and leaned against one of the panels. "Ranma it is." "I'm a technician for the computer's sensors. Dr. Katsuragi wants them checked every four hours so the temperature doesn't rise. I don't know, there's just something about this 'THING,'" he stuck a thumb back towards the creature, "that puts me on edge." "How did you join my father's expedition?" Ranma crossed his arms over his chest and bent his neck back so he could see the blinding white sky so many feet above. Why he was stuck in Antarctica of all places wasn't all that big of a mystery as Nabiki's manipulations definitely had a hand it his decision. He should have known better...listening to Nabiki was always a mistake. When she offered to get him a real job that would not only pay well but also train him to join her company as well he should have known it was too good to be true. Curse his consummate skills in Anything Goes Computer Diagnostics and Repair! He sighed at his sorry situation. Still...at least it got him out of that crazy hell-hole that was Nerima, at least for a little while. "Hey!" "Huh? What?" He was shaken from his daze. "You sorta spaced out there for awhile..." "Nah, don't worry about it. It's nothing." He still had his doubts about this mad doctor's theories, he was running the computer system ragged. He was replacing circuit boards and cables daily! "Well then Ranma...will you answer my question?" "What question?" Misato was pissed. It was bad enough he didn't look at her, but ignoring her as well? If she wanted that kind of casual indifference she'd have gone to her father! This called for serious measures. "The question I just asked you jerk!" She shoved him backwards. "Hey! Whaddaya do that for!?" "You weren't listening at all, were you?" "Nope!" His grin was really beginning to irritate her... "Why you...!" Her insult was interrupted by the wail of klaxons. Both teens looked up as emergency lights began to flash and urgent voices began to give instructions over the intercom system. A shuddering of metal and the sound of wrenching steel filled the air as the icy walls of the docking bay crumbled under unidentified tremors. "S2 reaction! We have a reaction! All personnel retreat to the surface!" "Energy regeneration exceeding expected parameters! Solenoid wavelength is losing cohesion!" "Try to contain it! We can't let it regenerate!" Misato looked up at the surface from her vantage point so close to the Giant and recognized her father's voice as he barked orders to the scientists and technicians in his employ. "Misato! You have to get out of there!" Ranma saw a glow appear over the giant, a fierce aura of chaotic power and divine breath, and force its way into every corner of the room; blinding those around it for moments, the way a flashbulb does, before rising in the air and to freedom. Emergency alerts flashed through the base as the Giant of Light slowly lumbered across the sea of snow to its original resting place, leaving the lance buried with the foolish Lillums that sought to imprison its divine power. Snow caved in, ice melted, rain fell as a total reversal of the norm occurred at the nadir of the planet. As the Giant rose, an explosion of energy carried Ranma and Misato upwards, their frail and tiny forms cast in his wake as ADAM ascended to Heaven. Ranma watched as Misato's form was pulled faster than his own and tried to maneuver himself towards her only to be smashed against a catwalk. His last sight before blackness overwhelmed him was of purple hair tossed in tempestuous gusts. Ranma awoke to find himself lodged between the twisted catwalk and the twisted lance. Reaching out with his ki, he empowered his arms to bend the steel cage around him and flee the base. The awful sound of metal bending screeched through the air and awoke other survivors. The lance refused to neither bend nor break, it simply was what it was and refused to be bent into any other shape. Ranma spread his battle aura and created an outline of indented metal where he lay, his ki forcing the metal down in a shape that reminded one of a snow angel. "Dr. Katsuragi! Your arm!" An assistant screamed from across the deck. "Leave me be! I have to save Misato!" The doctor's gruff tone pushed back the worried sea of technicians around him, splitting the proverbial Red Sea. Ranma wearily got to his feet and scuffed the debris from his feet. It was at that exact moment that the above ground crews were imploded by blasts of light ejected from the Giant's eyes. Girders, glass windows, lab equipment, and other hazardous wreckage rained upon the helpless survivors and crushed many of those that were injured. Dr. Katsuragi's arm was stripped of its remaining flesh by a falling tank of sulfuric acid, the corrosive fluid dripping away skin and muscle leaving bloodied bone behind. Even with irreparable damage to his own body, the doctor lifted his daughter and carried her out towards the underground escape pods, determined not to fail her again. Ranma had to give the guy some credit, he had guts. Turning back to the lance, Ranma observed that it was glowing strongly with a soft yellow light. It seemed to illuminate the room with its pale iridescence, a sickly color that seemed to emaciate the faces of those that survived. Tentatively, Ranma reached out to touch the aura and in a flash he was gone. ---Escape Bay--- The underground warehouses each held six life pods that fed off of six diesel generators, a back-up plan in case an experiment went wrong, in turn these pods would be shot through conduits until reaching the surface. Dr. Katsuragi's skeletal hand grabbed hold of a handle and yanked with all its might. It came off. The acid had burned away nerves as well as flesh so the good doctor felt no pain as the appendage left his body only to clutter the ground in so many pieces. He gazed lovingly at his daughter and regretted his decision of work over family, and silently hoping that this final act of fatherly love would erase the hurt feelings between them. A blast was heard from above. Adam was burrowing down now to make its new resting place, if the teams of technicians were successful then Adam would expel all its power and shrink to an embryonic stage when it used its weapon. The power released would be enormous, a staggering death toll around the world! These thoughts whirled in the head of Hiromi Katsuragi as he lay bleeding over the escape pod. Misato brought only one possession of her father's to the surface, his white cross necklace. He hoped it would give her better luck than it did him. His last thoughts were interrupted as the world was wiped clean. ---2015, Tokyo-3--- Shinji Ikari stood at a phone booth on the West Side of town waiting for his ride. It had been a decade since he last saw Gendo Ikari, his estranged father. He led a quiet life with his uncle and aunt, had few friends, but he had stability. But that was over now, his father sent word last week that he was needed in Tokyo-3 for the good of humanity, who was he to disagree? A thunderous crash echoed off the nearby warehouses and shook the high tension wires around him. An enormous explosion off in the distance answered his query. A radiant blast that tore at his clothes and forced him skittering down the street. Another crash and the sounds of warfare. A green shoulder encased in a white armor plate drifted into view from behind a mountain. The Third Child's story began. ---2015, Berlin--- "C'mon! I don't need to go to Tokyo! I'd much rather stay here!" A young girl, perhaps fourteen, wafted down the corridor. Her eyes were brilliant stars of intelligence, and hid all too well her cunning, manipulative mind. Her hair was auburn with flecks of brown and mirrored her mood perfectly, fortunately her guardian had experience with her ways. "Now, now, Asuka. Wouldn't you like to meet the other Children? I hear the Third is quite handsome..." He was baiting her. "Besides, you're the greatest, wouldn't you like to upstage him? He had the highest beginner synch ratio, even higher than yours." She was egotistical, as he had been in his youth, why not use that to his advantage. "Well... I guess I _should_ pound some humility the poor sap, I mean, it's preposterous for anyone to think that their better than I!" She'd fallen for his ruse. "I'll do it!" Asuka grinned evilly as she thought of the Third and the righteous justice she would enact on his prone pride... The man sweatdropped as the girl gave off yet another maniacal chuckle. Maybe honing her competitive streak wasn't a good idea. Well, it wasn't the first time he made a mistake. Ranma Saotome had made plenty. At age thirty-four, the young Saotome was the picture of health, both mentally and physically. Indeed many thought him to be unmovable, unshakable, and unflappable; but it was not always that way. After seeing the Angel of God in Antarctica, Ranma was cast into the sea and the mercy of nature. ADAM's reversion to embryonic form caused a tremendous backlash of power that cascaded out from the wings as Katsuragi's Solenoid system expelled all the Giant's kinetic energy; as a result, Ranma was carried by the waves to Australia. From there he was taken back to Japan by the Red Cross as the government began dredging the ocean for corpses. They were all dead, Akane, Soun, Genma, the Kunos, Ukyo, Shampoo, Cologne, Mousse, Happosai, Ryoga, Akari, everyone gone in the instant where he couldn't help them. Drowning in sorrow and sinking to the depths of the sea, never to return. It had taken a year for him to pull his fragile psyche back to some semblance of normal, in that year he continued honing his skills and learned the secret , forbidden techniques of the Musubetsu Kakuto Ryu sealed by Genma years before. As the government sold off the land to other countries, GEHIRN, the organization that had funded Katsuragi's research and the ill-fated expedition, solicited him. They were offering all survivors of the Katsuragi Expedition lifetime employment with the organization in an attempt to appear magnanimous to the victims. The only other survivor Ranma ever heard of was Gendo Ikari, Katsuragi's friend and co-head of the disastrous enterprise, a man he had gotten to know during the first few months of the excavation. With much reluctance, Ranma moved to Berlin, Germany, and became a member of GEHIRN and later NERV as nothing held him to his homeland any longer. Kasumi and Nabiki had survived as had several of his friends, Hiroshi and Daisuke, and his mother. As a Major, he was in charge of information gathering and the protection of the Second Child, Asuka Langley Sohryu. When he first arrived he was apprehensive as they issued him a firearm but then the style of warfare _had_ changed. After taking his first bullet he eagerly learned how to fire a gun. Now his superiors, the SEELE council of Human Instrumentality, wanted him to travel to Japan with the Second Child. He was given Alpha level security clearance and the embryo of ADAM for transport. He shuddered as he looked at the thick briefcase sitting by his bed. "We're leaving at 03:00:00 hours tomorrows so pack and get some sleep. G'night Asuka-chan." He knew she hated being called that. "Shiest! Will you stop calling me that! I'm fourteen and a young woman, I won't have you treating me as a child anymore!" "I'll stop calling you Asuka-_chan_ when you leave my supervision. Until that time I'll treat you as my ward which you are." He chose to ignore her flagrant flirting and patted her gently on the head. With a final, defiant scoff of disgust, Asuka left in a tiff down the gray hallways of NERV branch 2, Berlin. Ranma watched her go but made no move to follow. He had a few calls to make before they left. ---The Ilpalazzo 2, Tokyo-3--- "Asuka! Asuka! It's time to get up!" Ranma yanked on his ward's arm. After ten more tries he gave up, throwing the arm back down, where it bounced twice before lying still. Ranma had had a good night's sleep, mediation through dreaming, and was ready to tackle the difficult tasks of today, which included his physical and CAT scans at NERV. He just hoped that the doctor wasn't a woman, they always tended to leer at him while he was nude and always asked for that 'special sample' that they so desperately needed 'for the good of humanity'. He scoffed and walked to the bathroom for a long soak. Asuka's eyes opened as the sliding door shut and she threw off the blankets. Padding across the carpeted floor, she knelt by the door and peeked in through the keyhole, watching as Ranma settled himself in the furo. Unfortunately for her, his back was to her but she did get a glimpse of his nicely rounded ass as he stepped in, it was a shame he wouldn't just accept her advances... She continued to watch until he began to stand and, realizing her perilous position, Asuka leapt back into bed with the covers up to her neck, one eye partially open. Her guardian walked out of the bathroom wearing only a towel around his waist and deftly placed both of their uniforms on the dresser. Her mouth was dry in anticipation as he began to disrobe... When he took off his towel to reveal a pair of boxers, Asuka screamed in frustration. ---NERV Headquarters, Tokyo-3--- Two individuals sat in a darkened room as light flickered off them, illuminating their faces. They were Rei Ayanami and Shinji Ikari - the First and Third Children respectively- and they were currently watching as an enormous whale shaped angel was neatly filleted by a red EVA. The prog. knife cut cleanly through the skin of the beast and gore gushed out from the wound. "After this occurred the angel was shot at point blank range by two battleships and expired. The fastest angel defeat yet." Dr. Ritsuko Akagi stopped the footage and flipped on the lights. "Wow! She may be the best pilot so far! Maybe she'll be more normal than these two." Misato gestured to the couple. Shinji gave her the evil eye while Rei didn't seem to give any reaction at all. Since the catastrophe fifteen years ago, Misato Katsuragi had changed considerably. As a child, she was know for being withdrawn and quiet, after Second Impact her personality had flipped completely, she was quick to smile and make fun, her smile infectious and her eyes bright. Her father's plan succeeded in saving her life but she still had a long scar on her chest and left breast from her horrible ordeal at the South Pole. The events had plagued her nightmares for years afterward. After two years her mind began to function again and she was soon attending college with Ritsuko Akagi and Ryouji Kaji, her boyfriend. As the years progressed her vitality and talkative nature grew even more pronounced but an obsessive desire for vengeance against the Angels found her in the military and soon NERV. At NERV she was Captain Katsuragi, military operations officer, and an excellent tactician capable of split-second decisions that ultimately won the day; also at NERV she was reunited with her two friends Kaji and Ritsuko. As guardian for the Third Child Shinji Ikari, she was a disaster - her 'roommate' did most of the cooking and cleaning, but she was a sound guardian for the young man. Now she was taking Asuka from Germany under her wing. Now, with her omnipresent can of UCC Coffee, she reviewed the battle against the Sixth Angel. "She outperformed our latest projections and was able to swim with the B-equipment! By all calculations that can't be done! She's incredible." Ritsuko sipped at her NERV mug. "And I'll be her guardian I suppose?" Misato raised an eyebrow in the direction of Shinji. "Well, we don't know yet. She came here with her own guardian but it'll all be up to Commander Ikari. They stayed at a hotel last night and the Commander will make a decision today, so they'll probably be hanging around here until then." Ritsuko slid her chair back and gestured to Maya at the door. "If you'll excuse me I have to give Asuka's guardian their physical." "Is it a man?" Misato prodded relentlessly. Her relationship with Kaji had been disintegrating since college and she was always open to other options, especially ones that were tall, handsome, and had a great butt. "I don't know. But I guess we'll find out." Ritsu and Maya left through the right doorway and Misato was left with the children still staring at the viewscreen. "Uh guys? The films over..." "We are aware of that fact Major Katsuragi." Rei deadpanned. ---Recreational Wing of NERV Geo-Front--- "Now Major Saotome we'll start your required physical." Ritsuko wore her customary lab coat and was seated next to Maya at the end of gym #5; today had been particularly stressful due to the mandatory diagnostics performed on EVA -02. Her glasses hung from the tip of her nose as Ranma finished off a can of pocari sweat, his uniform jacket pulling tight against his pecs. "First will be an examination in regards to your heartbeat, reflexes, blood...I think you get the idea." "Please Dr. Akagi, Lt. Ibuki, just call me Ranma. I don't really need the title, it just goes along with the job. Besides, I always encourage good employee relations."" He flashed them a lopsided grin showing perfect teeth. The woman's hearts skipped a beat and a crimson flush grew on their faces. "Well, _Ranma_, you can call me Ritsuko and this is Maya." "Hello." Came Maya's timid reply. "Nice to meet you." Ranma bend forward and kissed her hand. "I think we'll get along just fine." "Now, follow me to the examination room and we can get this over with. I'm sure you have a lot to do today, what with the transfer and all. Commander Ikari will be making the decision regarding your continued guardianship of Pilot Sohryu today." "Not really, my superiors already took care of it." He looked at the aura surrounding her and it was as if he could read her mind. "You don't like Commander Ikari that much do you?" He spoke in a flat tone, there was no room for argument. Ritsuko was, needless to say, shocked that he would ask such a thing. "What-whatever gives you that idea?" "Just call it a hunch." He winked at her. "Let's just get on with it okay?" She led him out a set of double door and through a narrow hallway to a plain looking door. A sterile, white room with metal walls looked back at them from the entrance. Ritsu flipped the lights and a spartan room was revealed beyond, two sliding chairs, a metal desk and a gray metal examining table with black cushions. Stretching out his senses, Ranma could tell that two audio sensors were hidden in the walls and one video recorder was hidden in another. Noting the locations he began to disrobe. Ritsu watched in evident relish as the well muscled male lay half nude on the table before her. She hoped that Maya was recording all of this in the observation room. A small trail of drool made its way down her mouth. Since his defeat at the hands of the Messenger of God, he had been training himself even harder than before to make sure he wouldn't be so helpless ever again; Ranma was now capable of far more than he was in his teens. Since that time he had been conditioning his body for extended workouts and ki manipulation. Now he was all that his father wished for him to be, the greatest martial artist in the world, a goal he had achieved only in memory of his dearly departed friends and family. Now considered to be the last practitioner and Grand Master of Musubetsu Kakuto Ryu, he held a grand master status in kempo, kendo, amazon Whu-Shu, karate, tai-chi and ninjitsu with master status in judo, jeet kun, capoeira, and shotokan. Through the teachings of various sects of monks, he was able to control, suppress, direct, and supervise the flow of ki in his body, resulting in rapid growth and enhancement of his musculature. He was now capable of punching through three feet of reinforced steel with his bare hands, kick through concrete, hold his breath for fifteen minutes, leap thirty feet straight up in the air, and run 28.3 miles without breaking a sweat. As he began working as a lab technician in NERV's second branch he was approached by an operative of the SEELE council of Human Instrumentality. Apparently, when he entered into their service, the MAGI pulled out his performance file from the Katsuragi Expedition. Serving as a low level service technician seemed a good position since no one ever took the time to relay all the lower staff that had perished in the explosion, advantageous to say the least. If Dr. Akagi scanned his blood for 'SIN' she'd not find a trace, but as it was assumed that everyone was infected, she wouldn't. 'SIN' was the DNA of ADAM that dispersed into the atmosphere and spread around the world, recently sterility had become a major problem and was attributed to the hindrance of the Angel's DNA to our own. Every person living on the planet (with the exception of Ranma and three members of the SEELE council) was infected as it was passed through childbirth and adults living at the time inhaled the DNA unknowingly. This was the deciding factor in the selection of the Children as the higher percentages of Angel DNA in the genetic structure allowed the chosen ease in piloting and synchronizing with ADAM's children. "We'll check your blood pressure and heart rate first." Ritsuko slipped the cuff around his firm arm, casually caressing his skin. The cuff inflated with each squeeze of air but shattered moments later, before making a mark on his skin. She looked incredulously from the tattered remains of the cuff to his exposed arm. "Uh...we'll take it manually alright?" She fumbled with shaking hands for her watch. Even through her nervousness she took a moment to run her hand along his silky smooth skin before finding his pulse. "Sure, but I thought I'd tell you that this is gonna be difficult." ---SEELE Council room, location unknown--- It had existed since time immemorial, a chamber galvanized against the ravages of time and war. It was said that Hitler planned his genocidal campaign in that very room, that the French Revolution was planned within those hallowed walls. Now, it held a meeting with far more reaching implications, such as the end of mankind. SEELE 01: Our operative seems to be doing well. SEELE 10: Yes, with any luck he will soon be privy to NERV's defense grids. SEELE 02: Then we will attack NERV and reclaim what is rightfully ours. SEELE 05: However, if Dr. Akagi screens for 'SIN' then our rouse is over. SEELE 12: Will our alibi for his blood fall through? SEELE 01: It will do us no good to worry about such trivial matters. What we need to discuss are the restrictions to be placed on Ikari. SEELE 06: In the long term, I suggest cutting the defense budget. SEELE 01: Agreed. If the situation should warrant any direct action our forces should be able to capture the Geo-Front in one swift move. SEELE 04: The UN's operative, Ryouji Kaji, will he interfere with our plans? SEELE 01: I doubt it. Operative Saotome should be able to handle the mission. I believe we are all aware of his...unique...abilities. The black monoliths of SEELE begin to chuckle at some unseen joke, their hollow, booming laughter echoing off the unseen walls of the chamber and reverberating into a cacophony of twisted, mechanical gaiety. The images disappeared as their laughter subsided until only the tallest monolith carrying the designation 'SEELE 01' remained. Even that disappeared into the form of a tall elderly man wearing a queer sort of visor and green robes. He was seated at a gray desk whose location could have been anywhere in the world, for this man was the driving force behind Project E and the NERV organization, Lorenz Kihl. Now, sitting in the darkness, he raised his hands as if in prayer to some unforgiving god. "Ikari, you have begun to cross us. If you are that arrogant as to face this organization then you will surely be crushed. You will pay Ikari." That having been said, the image returned to its previous shape. SEELE 01: The time is coming Ikari when you will draw upon your hidden resources, and it will be then that you realize they no longer exist. ---NERV examination room 309--- Ritsuko was in a quandary, how could this even be a man? Ranma was sitting in a chair, half naked, while she pondered the phenomena. [His reflexes reacted before I even touched him, the testing needles I used snapped on his skin, his musculature is far beyond anything I've ever seen, and he has the healthiest lungs and heart in Japan. What could be causing this? Maybe this final test'll shed some light on It.] "Ranma?" "Yes? If you wanna take my blood you'll have to warn me otherwise you won't be able to." Always the trickster, he had been toying with her, using his enhanced control of ki to strengthen his cells to impossible levels. When she'd tried his reflexes he'd stretched out his aura to stop the rubber hammer an inch away from his skin. "Uh no. That's not what I need from you. Your almost done here, I just need one more sample, a very important one," she snickered, "I need a sperm sample." His face went white, his hands began to twitch. Ritsuko opened a drawer on the wheeling cart next to her and gave him a sixteen ounce plastic specimen cup. "Here." "Uh..." "Don't worry, I'll leave the room. Just call when you're done!" She opened the door, "That is unless you need some _help_?" She added playfully. "Uh no, I'll be just fine by myself." She slipped through the door to join Maya in the observation room finally understanding why Misato liked to tease people. It was fun! Not feeling particularly miffed but feeling that he should at least get back at Ritsuko for her offer of a 'hand-on' approach he reached out with his senses for the surveillance equipment in the walls. Turning to face the video feed, he dropped his pants. Maya had been sitting in the observation room for three hours as Ritsuko poked, stretched, and prodded Ranma in the exam. That is not to say she didn't have fun gazing at a half nude male flexing, but she had severe reservations about this next test. A knock sounded from the hidden door. She turned around in time to see a short crop of blonde hair slip through the doorway. "Maya? Has he started yet?" Her sempai combed her fingers through her hair and took a seat. She swiveled over a bit to allow Ritsuko room at the monitor. On screen Ranma had just placed the cup on the desk beside him. The camera was planted at midlevel with a horizontal lens, allowing for a complete vista of the subject before them. "Are you sure this is a good idea sempai?" For some mysterious reason Ranma had turned towards the camera. Almost as if he knew exactly where it was planted but that was preposterous, wasn't it...? Ritsu laughed a bit than removed her lab coat. "Don't worry Maya, it's just a joke anyway." It may have been a joke before, but as Ranma dropped his pants to the full view of the camera, that joke turned into a serious proposal. The fiber-optic camera was color and recorded in full, crisp, clarity. Maya fainted as the hunky subject began. A small trail of drool fell from Ritsuko's mouth as she saw the benefits of his 'muscle' enhancements. ---Two hours later--- Ritsuko left the observation room visibly shaken. Maya was on the verge of collapse as she held a fresh tissue to her bleeding nose. In fact, Maya was leaning heavily against Ritsu as she walked down to the examining room. Her assistant left for the cafeteria, at this point they both needed a few cups of coffee, or a cold shower. Knuckles rapped on the metal door, the hollow sound reverberating off the sterile walls. Ritsuko held her breath as she walked in then, hoping he was done. "Have you finished Ranma?" She stopped. Right in her tracks. Ranma was sitting at the desk, slipping his shoes on as Ritsuko staggered to the desk. Three specimen cups were lined on the desk. Visibly shaken, she motioned him out and shut off the lights, reminding herself to run a steroid enhancement scan on his 'samples.' Her last thought was of Misato. If her purple-haired friend wanted to get with Ranma that night, she'd better buy a lot of lubricant and an ice-pack. ---To be continued--- I hope you all enjoyed this little light-hearted romp through the world of NERV. This whole concept was thought up and written down in response to the glaring lack of Ranma/EVA crossovers. At the Church of Crossover Couples, maintained by the VGAP, the slots for fanfics pairing Ranma and Misato, Ritsuko, or Maya were blank. Somebody has to do something about this! I'm now putting out a challenge, whether anyone will take it I don't know, a challenge to write a good piece of fanfiction pairing Ranma and Misato, Ranma and Ritsuko, or Ranma and Maya. Questions? 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